Thinking of “Consequences” as the Good Stuff

here By | 2017-06-10T07:43:06+00:00 March 30th, 2017|BETWEEN A ROCK AND A TEENAGER|

see by Dr. Jane Bluestein A very different approach! Here’s a new spin on the notion of “consequences,” a term familiar to every parent. But rather than looking at the negative outcome of behavioral choices your children make, let’s examine a more positive alternative, a shift in focus that is far more effective in generating the [...]

5 Characteristics of a Good Boundary…

Can I Buy Dapoxetine Over The Counter By | 2017-06-10T07:47:50+00:00 March 23rd, 2017|BETWEEN A ROCK AND A TEENAGER|

click by Dr. Jane Bluestein ...And why they are better than rules Boundaries are tools for building cooperation in relationships, for letting others know what you want, and for letting them know which options are available to them (for getting what they want). Set boundaries when you want behaviors to change and wish to avoid negative, [...]

Guidelines for Offering Choices to Your Children

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Amoxicillin Online Order by Dr. Jane Bluestein Practical tips for parents and caregivers • Choices, like boundaries, are motivational tools that encourage cooperation through input and empowerment. Offer choices in the absence of desirable child behavior, to encourage your child to perform a particular behavior he or she is not currently demonstrating. • Choices can help you avoid power [...]

Motivating Cooperative Behavior By | 2017-06-12T11:35:25+00:00 March 16th, 2017|BETWEEN A ROCK AND A TEENAGER|

Ordering Provigil From Canada by Dr. Jane Bluestein Three Approaches to Authority Relationships Two Win-Lose approaches that can compromise the emotional safety of the environment: Powering: Adult Wins, Child Loses Strategies: Humiliation, loss of dignity, violation of self-esteem; criticism, shaming, verbal or emotional violence Threat to physical safety, physical violence Conditional approval or love; threat of emotional abandonment Deprivation [...]

9 Things to Remember When Setting Boundaries

enter site By | 2017-06-12T11:36:16+00:00 February 23rd, 2017|BETWEEN A ROCK AND A TEENAGER|

see by Dr. Jane Bluestein Practical tips for making boundaries work * Use boundaries to let your children know your limits and tolerances, your availability, the conditions under which you will participate in some activity, which privileges are available, or the conditions under which a privilege is available to your children. Use boundaries to give your [...]

Raising Teens in a Star Wars World By | 2017-06-10T08:00:44+00:00 February 21st, 2017|BETWEEN A ROCK AND A TEENAGER| Today’s struggles to raise teens to adulthood is far tougher than our parents had to do. Decisions they make more often carry fatal or lifelong consequences. Their world is nothing like the world we grew up in. When I had a classmate I couldn't get along with, I could avoid them. I heard about the [...]

The Challenge of Setting Boundaries

watch By | 2017-06-10T08:02:08+00:00 February 16th, 2017|BETWEEN A ROCK AND A TEENAGER| by Dr. Jane Bluestein A Win-Win Alternative to an Authoritarian or Permissive Approach Few of us are especially adept at setting boundaries with anyone, and for good reason. Let’s back up a bit. When you were growing up, were you told that other people’s needs were more important than yours? Were you rewarded for self-sacrificing [...]

Parenting Teens – How to Draw the Line By | 2017-06-10T08:05:17+00:00 February 9th, 2017|BETWEEN A ROCK AND A TEENAGER|

by Dr. Jane Bluestein Counselors know that when parents set clear boundaries, they take care of their teens and themselves. An earlier version of this article first appeared in the counseling magazine, Adolescence (March 1994), to support the work of counselors and therapists working with parents and families.Talk to the parents of any teenager and this [...]

Motivation vs. Manipulation

By | 2017-06-10T08:13:03+00:00 February 2nd, 2017|BETWEEN A ROCK AND A TEENAGER|

by Dr. Jane Bluestein There is a difference You see the kids on task and behaving, and it’s natural to want to reinforce what they’re doing. By the same token, the kids who are dragging their feet or not doing their work (or chores) may need a bit of a fire lit under them. There are [...]

When Your College Student Wants to Drop Out: How Will You React?

By | 2017-06-10T08:15:38+00:00 February 1st, 2017|BETWEEN A ROCK AND A TEENAGER|

OK, you’ve worked with your child for years preparing them for college. They’ve done the community service since junior high that looks great on their entrance applications. You’ve sat through every sporting event until you are the official stats keeper, and snack packer. You’ve cringed through advanced Algebra, agonized over assisting them on their SAT’s, [...]