PARENTING

TREC Jr. Academy

By |2019-03-06T20:19:55-07:00February 2nd, 2019|Homeschooling, PARENTING|

Taking Responsibility for Educational Choices (TREC) has a twenty year success rate. After taking a break to care for family, TREC is returning as a Jr. Academy serving 5th-7th grade. Monday-Thursday 9-2 $300 a month Located in Eagle Creek, Oregon We are an alternative school supporting Christian values and committed to teaching your teen how [...]

Thinking of “Consequences” as the Good Stuff

By |2019-02-02T19:58:23-07:00March 30th, 2017|PARENTING|

by Dr. Jane Bluestein A very different approach! Here’s a new spin on the notion of “consequences,” a term familiar to every parent. But rather than looking at the negative outcome of behavioral choices your children make, let’s examine a more positive alternative, a shift in focus that is far more effective in generating the [...]

Guidelines for Offering Choices to Your Children

By |2019-02-02T19:59:39-07:00March 23rd, 2017|PARENTING|

by Dr. Jane Bluestein Practical tips for parents and caregivers • Choices, like boundaries, are motivational tools that encourage cooperation through input and empowerment. Offer choices in the absence of desirable child behavior, to encourage your child to perform a particular behavior he or she is not currently demonstrating. • Choices can help you avoid power [...]

Motivating Cooperative Behavior

By |2019-02-02T20:00:06-07:00March 16th, 2017|PARENTING|

by Dr. Jane Bluestein Three Approaches to Authority Relationships Two Win-Lose approaches that can compromise the emotional safety of the environment: Powering: Adult Wins, Child Loses Strategies: Humiliation, loss of dignity, violation of self-esteem; criticism, shaming, verbal or emotional violence Threat to physical safety, physical violence Conditional approval or love; threat of emotional abandonment Deprivation [...]

9 Things to Remember When Setting Boundaries

By |2019-08-14T20:04:09-07:00February 23rd, 2017|PARENTING, Uncategorized|

by Dr. Jane Bluestein Practical tips for making boundaries work * Use boundaries to let your children know your limits and tolerances, your availability, the conditions under which you will participate in some activity, which privileges are available, or the conditions under which a privilege is available to your children. Use boundaries to give your [...]

Raising Teens in a Star Wars World

By |2019-08-14T20:05:07-07:00February 21st, 2017|PARENTING|

Today’s struggles to raise teens to adulthood is far tougher than our parents had to do. Decisions they make more often carry fatal or lifelong consequences. Their world is nothing like the world we grew up in. When I had a classmate I couldn't get along with, I could avoid them. I heard about the [...]

The Challenge of Setting Boundaries

By |2019-08-14T20:06:28-07:00February 16th, 2017|PARENTING|

by Dr. Jane Bluestein A Win-Win Alternative to an Authoritarian or Permissive Approach Few of us are especially adept at setting boundaries with anyone, and for good reason. Let’s back up a bit. When you were growing up, were you told that other people’s needs were more important than yours? Were you rewarded for self-sacrificing [...]

Parenting Teens – How to Draw the Line

By |2019-08-14T20:08:12-07:00February 9th, 2017|PARENTING|

by Dr. Jane Bluestein Counselors know that when parents set clear boundaries, they take care of their teens and themselves. An earlier version of this article first appeared in the counseling magazine, Adolescence (March 1994), to support the work of counselors and therapists working with parents and families.Talk to the parents of any teenager and this [...]

When Your College Student Wants to Drop Out: How Will You React?

By |2019-08-14T20:10:08-07:00February 1st, 2017|PARENTING|

OK, you’ve worked with your child for years preparing them for college. They’ve done the community service since junior high that looks great on their entrance applications. You’ve sat through every sporting event until you are the official stats keeper, and snack packer. You’ve cringed through advanced Algebra, agonized over assisting them on their SAT’s, [...]